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“The only way to have a friend is to be one” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
Friends are a part and parcel of our daily lives. In order to be friends with someone, a lot of emotional as well as psychological processes take place. However, putting into simple words, we could infer that a friend is the one who stays beside us not only during our joyous memories but also lends a shoulder in the darkest of alleys.
A “friendship” culminates into a beautiful relationship when it is not only balanced but is also reciprocated by both the parties. But what happens when this relationship hits a topsy-turvy? How do we deduce that the person at the other end is not interested in moving forth with the friendship?
Most often these terminations are not done in a straightforward fashion owing to various emotional attachments or to simply avoid ‘the awkwardness “. However there are a few red signals that might act as saviours and elevate one from stressing and asking the same question to oneself, ” are we friends anymore?”
In the following phrases, I have discussed some of the signals which might open up some hazy avenues as to know if someone is not wanting to be a friend.
- They Are Keeping a Distance.
This is one of the first red signals in a friendship. This usually happens when they stop taking your phone calls or stop meeting at the usual hangouts. It might happen as such that even after several calls or text messages there are very minimal or even null responses from the opposite side.
It could also happen that even if you stumble upon each other they tend to avoid you or in the worst-case scenario make excuses so as to not engage in a long drawn conversation.
Keeping a distance also could be implied emotionally where the person at the other end does not reciprocate or cater to the emotional needs. They might act distant and stop sharing their activities with you.
- Stop Getting Enthusiastic About Things That You Have In Common
Most friendships include activities or interests that both parties enjoy sharing. It might be going out to a particular cafe for a cup of warm coffee, taking care of plants or even painting together.
However, when a ‘friend’ starts being evasive and stops showing up for such plans a few times, it’s time to rethink about the depths of the friendship.
- You Are Always The First Person to Reach Out.
This is one of the biggest and probably most obvious signs that someone is trying to cut you off their lives. If you are the first person to text them, call them or invite them over then probably the friendship is already in doldrums.
If you are the one who is always trying to get through that call or waiting for the friend to respond to your calls and messages it’s time that you introspect once more and set the prerogatives accordingly.
- Blocking on Social Media
No matter how devastated you get when you see that a “friend” has blocked you from their social media accounts, know that it is a clear and conscious decision on their behalf to stop you from being a part of their life.
In the current generation, social media is of paramount importance and if your ‘ friends do not want you to know about their whereabouts then probably you are no more “#bffs”.
- Camouflaging Words
If they tell you phrases like ” I don’t deserve to be a friend ” or ” This friendship is not right for us” then it’s time that you bid adieu to these friends. Most often they are too awkward or even under guilt to tell you that they don’t want to be friends with you.
Therefore they chose more sugar-coated words and tried to take the onus on themselves.
These were some of the most obvious and widespread signs that you might come across. Chances are that most of us have been on either side of the spectrum at least once in our lives and we know that it is difficult.
Losing a friend can be emotionally exasperating if we have been attached to them. On the other hand, due to varied reasons, you might want to cut someone off your life and there is no easy way to do that as well. However, from a different perspective, it can be put into purview that communication might be the key. One can at least try to talk over the problems, lest solve it as it would not only give the other person some time but would also serve as a closure
